Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Poem - Author Unknown

The following is a poem shared with me by the aunt of a little girl named Adrianne, who is with Katie in Heaven:

God saw you getting tired,
The cure was not to be
He wrapped you in His loving Arms,
And whispered "Come to Me"
You suffered much in silence,
Your spirit did not bend
You faced your pain with courage,
Until the very end
You tried so hard to stay with us
Your fight was not in vain
God took you to His loving Home
And freed you from your pain
A golden heart stopped beating,
Two working hands at rest
God broke our hearts to prove to us,

Author Unknown

Monday, July 9, 2012

Life's Just Not Fair

Life's Just Not Fair

A Poem for Katie

A child born sick, a heart not whole...
How can she last? Not one soul knows.
And all the world cries out in vain,
Life's just not fair, it's not the same.

This little girl was whisked away...
To prep her for her surgery day.
A mother left with empty arms...
Life's just not fair, spare this one harm.

God gives and then He takes away,
And all thats left for us to say...
Is blessed be His holy name.
Yes, blessed be His holy name.

Mother's milk she cannot have.
Infection reigns, the outlook's bad.
What did this little baby do?
Life's just not fair, in this thing too.

"Come right back, it won't take long."
But when we returned, she was gone.
Doctors said, "Sorry we tried."
Life's just not fair, and then we cried.

God gives and then He takes away,
And all thats left for us to say...
Is blessed be His holy name.
Yes, blessed be His holy name.

This mother's arms lie empty still,
No baby's cries her ears to fill.
And all the world can feel her pain.
Life's just not fair, no use to feign.

In every person's heart we wonder...
What deed was done, what thought we pondered,
To deserve these trials and storms.
Life's just not fair, then one thought forms.

God gives and then He takes away,
And all thats left for us to say...
Is blessed be His holy name.
Yes, blessed be His holy name.

That baby's smile, those big blue eyes,
Her homecoming before she died,
What did we do to be so blessed?
Life's just not fair, God gives His best.

My life, my family, my home,
I did not earn them, yet they have come.
What mercy our God surely has
Life's just not fair, and I am glad

God gives and then He takes away
And all thats left for us to say
Is blessed be His holy name.
Yes, blessed be His holy name.

When Jesus died upon that cross
He did so because I was lost.
Unending blessings He has given
Life's just not fair, because He's risen

For if it were, then I would pay
For every deed and sinful way.
Yet sacrifice our God did make
Life's just not fair, so let's give thanks.

God gives, but sin He takes away
And all thats left for us to say
Is blessed be His holy name.
Oh, blessed be His holy name.

This is a poem I wrote a few weeks ago because I had been thinking of how often we say to ourselves, to each other, and to children just learning the disappointments and responsibilities of life that, "Life just isn't fair." This is what we use to explain away all of the bad things in life that happen to us without really stopping to think about what we as human beings deserve. The bible says in Romans 6:23 that, "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." The wages of sin - what we deserve in payment for our sin - is death.

Now stop there. I am not saying that the death of loved ones is what we deserve for breaking God's rules. Rather, it is our own death, a spiritual death and an eternal death. Katie's heart was not a punishment. Her death was not a punishment. John 9:1-3 says, "As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, 'Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?' 'Neither this man nor his parents sinned,' said Jesus, 'but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.'" That is utterly amazing to me, that God can use a birth defect to demonstrate His power and glory and to touch the lives of others for the better. This can be applied to just about anything. What's the worst thing that has happened to you lately? It could be any number of things, from the annoying to the devastating. Try filling in the blank - "_____________ happened so that the works of God might be displayed in me."

Wow, saying it aloud makes it sound like a responsibility, and it is. This really hits home for me, which is one reason I have taken awhile to post about it. I complain, I get frustrated, I probably react in the wrong way to a lot of things. When I stop and fill in the blank and say to myself, "This happened so that the works of God might be displayed in me," it becomes a responsibility and... a blessing. God did (blank) so that He could show me and others how wonderful, and powerful, and merciful, and glorious He is. Thank God that instead of giving me what I deserve, He gave up His Son to gift me with eternal life. Thank God I know that my child is in Heaven and that I will see her again. Thank God life isn't fair!

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Prayer Request

A little over a month ago, shortly after we were able to bring Katie home, I received an email from a couple who are expecting a little girl who has been diagnosed in utero with chylothorax. This is slightly different than Katie's chylothorax, because it is congenital and due to a lymphatic disorder, instead of post-operative (caused by damage done during surgery). The consequences are still very severe. I am not sure of all of the details regarding her lymphatic disorder, but I do know from Katie's experience with chylothorax that it will be very difficult to get this little girl the proper nutrition she needs in order to thrive because of her inability to process the types of fats that are present in breast milk and most formulas. I do know that this family is working very hard and researching using skimmed breast milk to help their baby get every benefit possible. For some reason, this family has really been on my mind this week. I keep thinking about their little girl and I feel led to ask you guys to help me pray for her. There are some very specific health issues that will arise due to her condition. One of them is getting her the proper nutrients, as mentioned previously. Another is that she will be very prone to developing pleural effusions (fluid) around her lungs that will need to be drained. The chylothorax can heal, as long as they are able to control her diet enough so that her body will stop producing this fluid long enough. She may be in the hospital a long time. In addition to praying for this little one's health, I also ask you to pray for strength for these parents. There is no way... no way to describe what it is like to have a baby with such severe health problems. It is not possible. Noone who has not been through it is capable of understanding. Even among parents who have been through this type of experience, each family's experience is completely unique. Even with the same diagnosis, one baby might overcome with flying colors, while another baby struggles. It is a walk that no other parent on earth can understand, it is unique and individual and there is only One who is capable of walking that path along with you. Please pray that God's presence in this family's life is just so strong.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Shutterfly Book II

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The poem in this shutterfly book is a slightly altered version of: 1/2 OF AN ANGEL'S HEART It's a beautiful day up in heaven. Jesus is rounding up his tiniest angels, to go live on earth, and be born. One of the sweetest angels says to Jesus "I don't want to leave, I like it here, and I will miss you." He reassures the scared little angel that everything will be okay, and that the angel is just going for a visit. The little angel is still not swayed on this idea. So Jesus kneels down, and says, "How about if you leave half of your heart here with me and take the other half with you, will that be okay?" The angel smiles and says, "I guess that will work." But the little angel is still a little scared. He asks, "Will I be okay with only half of my heart?" Jesus replies, "Of course you will, I have other angels there that will help you out, and you will be fine." Then Jesus gives the angel more details about His plan. He says, "When you are born, your mommy will be scared, so you have to be strong, and when you feel weak just remember that I have the other half of your heart." "Enjoy your time with your family, play and laugh everyday." "And when its time to come back to heaven, I will make your heart whole again. Always remember that you are not broken, just torn between two loves." Author Unknown

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Katie's Life In Pictures - Home Part III

These last four pics are of the day Katie went to heaven. The first three are that morning before I took her back to the ped's office. The last one is at the ped's office right before we left for the hospital. She looked and acted totally content! The only way we knew anything was wrong was because she had had so many poopie diapers and I was taking her temperature about every 2-3 hours.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Katie's Life In Pictures - Home Part II

This pic was kind of an "accident". I was trying to snap a photo and she did her gaggy face that she would make sometimes. I reached really quick to turn her on her side just in case she threw up but the pic still snapped, lol.